NYSC Camp Diary Day 4: it’s Friday ! Yay! 😫

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DON’T TURN UP IN THE MAMMY MARKET!!

This is not a case of paraventure, boya or boyant etc. 😫😫😫

I woke up at 2:30 with last nights (well four hours ago’s) Orijin, Heineken, red wine and Snapp all still fresh in my system. I’m not here for a lecture on how you shouldn’t mix drinks. Unless you have a coping strategy for camp, AMNORINTERESTED!!

I finally got out of bed at 3:20, but there was no water! 😫😫😫 aren’t my enemies winning? We had to go out and fetch water to baff. That’s exactly what we do here. It’s not showers, it’s not taking a bath, it’s baffling!!

After my baff, as I got back into my room, I realised I had missed a fight. The tension was still fresh though. I don’t remember what it was over, I just remember it being useless. So I carried my happy self to the parade ground for morning exercise and Man O’ war and a lecture. The former two activities were enjoyable even though they began at 5am.

It seems the fight spirit was floating in camp today though. I almost got into one myself. Like I said, Yoruba goes a long way here!

I was buying pure water. (Yes! You read right) and some girl wanted to buy some too so she pushed me to get through.

Me: Excuse me, there’s no need to push, just say excuse me.
Her: See this one? Did I touch you?
Everyone: (to me.) sorry, no vex.
Me: ah, I no vex, just next time make she talk excuse me.
Her: Why wheel I say excuse me? I didn’t even push her, I just touched her like this.
Me: You don’t need to touch me. I’m a human being, not an object.
Her: you’re a fool.
Me: Bitch what??
Everyone: Sister just say sorry.
Her: Never will I say sorry. Over my dead body.
Me: elenu buruku Oshi. Je ma Gbe ara iranu é kuro lati biyii.
Shop woman: E maa buni Aunty.
Turns to girl: No come back to my shop again.

Won’t lie, I wasn’t ready to fight. And when she dropped that fool yan, e shock my body!! I never esspered it. But I decided that if anyone pushes me again, ‘God bless you too’ I go talk.

From this post, it is evident that my pidgin use has increased. I’m not sure how I feel about this.

Anyway, fast forward to the evening when Wande Coal and Basketmouth came. Lagos State Welcome party was live.
Personally, I don’t findBasketmouth funny and he didn’t prove me wrong yesterday. However, when it came to real time content, I changed opinions. As the party was sponsored by Globacom, there were prizes. From N2000 glo credit to a brand new phone.

Wande Coal however was amazing. His vocals are insane: and his performance was great!!!

The show was good, and after we proceeded to the MAMMY market. This time I was only there for Orijin. Which apparently they’ve banned. The rumours on this still aren’t confirmed, but I’ll soon know.

Like I said, it’s getting fun.