I never thought I was a person who wanted to wait until marriage to have sex until I did it. I had never felt that fatigued in my life even though nothing really happened. My boyfriend at the time and I had been together for 6 weeks. To be honest those 6 weeks felt like forever. He had told me he wanted me to be his wife and because I was ‘love struck’ and naïve I believed him.
We had talked about having sex before and I had told him how much I wanted him to be my first. We always knew our time together was limited because he was going back home after a year abroad.
The weekend before he was going back home, he was staying at this hotel. I decided against going on some trip most people at my school gave a limb for every year and we chose to have sex that weekend cos boarding school was definitely not the place to lose your virginity.
The day it happened I told my mum I was going shopping for some new clothes because she didn’t approve of my having a boyfriend. We hung out at the mall for a bit while I pretended to window shop but I knew all I wanted was the D. We walked back to his hotel and when we got there talked for a bit. We started kissing and messing about. The moment I had been waiting for was finally here.
We’d made sure we got a couple of condoms cos you want to remain safe you know. He attempted to put it on but it was too small. We were better prepared than most and therefore had a second condom in a different size. He tried this one as well and it’s also too small. I knew his trailer was big but not no-condom-size big. We’d put in too much for it not to work and so we decided we were going to go raw.
He lasted somewhere between 2 and 3 minutes before his soldier went to sleep. We tried to go for it again and I did what I could to try wake him up. For another minute or so his soldier stood again but soon failed him in his time of need. I asked him “what’s up?” He looked ashamed when he told me this had never happened to him before.
This was not his first time and all the times we’d spoken about it he’d told me how he’d fuck me so hard I’d pass out. I guess I brought him back to earth. He overestimated himself so much but left me rather disappointed with his ability in bed.
If you’re in a relationship and it’s about to become long distance, I’d advise you not to fuck them if it’s the first time in your relationship. However, you control your life and if you feel like it’s the right time, go for it. If you do, don’t say I didn’t tell you it could end up being emotionally painful if things don’t work out.