Tokini, 20
I think the real reason I am a virgin today stems from several reasons other than my religion. Yes, I’m a Christian and I’ve always wanted to wait till I got married because it made sense to me but as I grew older and got involved with more guys/had more hormones kicking in – I WAS LIKE “ Shoot! No one has time for this. I could just do it and repent and several times, I’ve contemplated it too. However, I chose not to because:
1. I’ve always dreamt of having it with someone I truly loved and having that first time (which I’m well aware might just end up being terrible) with someone who I could talk to about it with after. I wanted it to be with someone that I’m secure with and could correct me on what to do next time. But seriously, I dreamt of having a discussion about it- Going for several rounds and then knowing that in the future, the person would still be that person for me.
So I guess – in all my past relationships I don’t think I found that person and when I do, I’m hoping that even if I do it before marriage, that we end up getting married (like our parents did).
2. I waited because the Bible has its reasons for telling you to wait. I think we all take for granted the warning God places in the bible and don’t fully understand everything he says/instructs us to do is for our own good. I sometimes ask why he sends ranging hormones if he wants us to wait BUT HEY! He knows best and waiting for that special person on your wedding day- is what he intended for us to do with our lives.
3. I know my luck, If I decided to have sex with some random stranger or guy from class etc.- WHAT IF I GET AN STD? WHAT IF I GET PREGNANT? WHAT IF I DIEEEEE? but really I think in those moments when the desire to have sex is overwhelming- these thoughts including those dealing with body image (What if my body isn’t right/I haven’t shaved etc) – they all play into the deterrence effect.
ALL THESE ARE WHY I MADE THE CHOICE TO WAIT.