Men, It’s Time to Reclaim the International Day of the Boy Child 

Last year, when journalist Kiki Mordi announced she would sponsor 100 girls through Alt School, certain accounts asked: “What about the boys?” A familiar refrain, repeated whenever opportunities are created specifically for women. From She Code Africa’s tech initiatives to female-focused scholarships, male voices often emerge to question why women are being prioritized.

Today, May 16, is International Day of the Boy Child. While women have organized, mobilized, and transformed International Women’s Day (March 8) into a global movement celebrating progress and spotlighting inequality, men—particularly those in positions of power—have largely failed to rally behind their own youth with the same vigor. Instead of building programs and safe spaces for boys facing their own challenges, some men resort to criticizing female-focused efforts. But this conversation shouldn’t be about matching women initiative for initiative, it must be about accountability. What are men doing for boys, beyond voicing resentment?

Every year, a familiar pattern plays out: some men emerge, demanding that women assume the welfare of boys, as though women have completed their centuries-long fight for equality and can now redirect their energy to solving everyone else’s problems. This concern is largely performative. 

In contrast, organizations like Boys Without Borders, founded by two men who recognized a gap and chose to fill it, are rare examples of what genuine commitment looks like. But they remain the exception. Their thoughtful, hands-on approach is drowned out by the louder chorus of critics who are more invested in only pointing out a perceived lack of support for boys than in actually doing anything about it.

As one Twitter user aptly observed: “The people who cry ‘what about the boy child’ are somehow even less interested in the boy child. This is fascinating to me. The boy child may actually be cooked for real. Nobody seems to care about him except as an instrument of propaganda.”

The comment cuts to the heart of the issue. Legitimate concerns about the boy child are weaponized, turning real issues into gender ploys. In the end, the people who claim to champion boys frequently leave them exactly where they started: overlooked, underserved, and reduced to talking points.

What might be possible if International Day of the Boy Child became a genuine catalyst for change? Instead of serving as a reactionary footnote to women’s progress, the day holds real potential. It can help in nurturing boys’ emotional intelligence, and confronting the silent mental health crisis that claims so many young male lives.

On a recent Bolt trip, the driver told me: “Women are leaving men behind, there are just more opportunities for them now.” 

His mindset, echoing several others, is unproductive and dangerous. When young boys absorb the narrative that “the world favors girls,” they become vulnerable to toxic ideologies that twist frustration into radicalization. The path from passive victimhood to extremism is very short, as portrayed in the Netflix series Adolescence. It’s important to note that the strides women have made didn’t come from divine luck or favoritism, they were hard-won through decades of relentless organizing, advocacy, and collective resolve.

If men feel left out, the more productive question isn’t “Why are women advancing?” but “Why aren’t we mobilizing in the same way?” 

John Okafor, co-founder of Boys Without Borders, exemplifies the approach of forward-thinking organizations. “We mark International Day of the Boy Child with intentionality, targeted online conversations, school outreach programs, and our inaugural Ibadan Boys Conference,” he shares. “In 2024, that event brought together over 150 boys from seven schools to engage with keynotes on mental health and participate in panels where accomplished young professionals offered firsthand guidance and encouragement.”

What would it look like if men truly took ownership of the International Day of the Boy Child? It would mean moving past the need for applause and instead doing the quiet work of building a better world for boys. This day shouldn’t be about scoring points in the gender debate or comparing celebrations. It should be about ensuring that boys are raised with the tools to become emotionally intelligent, empathetic, and accountable men. A generation that sees care as strength, not weakness. A generation that breaks cycles instead of inheriting them.

If men in leadership begin to use this day to initiate support programs that can mentor the next generation, it could become a turning point. Instead of asking “Why isn’t anyone clapping for us?”, maybe the better question is: “What are we doing to earn the legacy we want to leave behind?”