Nigerian Lives: 5 Nigerians On How Tribe and Religion Ended Their Relationships

In Hollywood’s Sinners, the love between Smoke and Mary collapses under the weight of an unspoken truth: society wouldn’t allow their interracial relationship to thrive. Smoke walks away, not out of lack of love, but to protect Mary from the racial realities of their world. Decades later, much has changed. Interracial and intercultural unions are no longer taboo in many parts of the world. But in Nigeria, new walls have taken the place of old ones.

While the country boasts a vibrant mix of cultures and beliefs, love still comes with conditions. Religious doctrines, tribal expectations, and family pressures continue to dictate who is deemed acceptable to love, or marry. In a society that prides itself on modernity, many young Nigerians still find themselves navigating silent wars waged in the name of compatibility.

Culture Custodian spoke to 5 people whose love stories were cut short by traditional values.

Mide*

I really liked this girl, but I don’t think we were meant to be together. From the moment I knew she was Igbo, I knew my mother would disagree. It got worse when I found out she came from a celestial church background, I’ve heard some juju stuff happening there. It was hard to leave her, but I had to because I’m not getting any older. I’m still not over her and we still see each other. 

Juls*

So I didn’t actually date this man. It was a situationship. I was considering a relationship when we had a conversation about religion. He said that I would have to become a Muslim to marry him, that he can’t have his wife leave her head open. I actually thought it was a joke but it wasn’t o. Note that this man already slept with me. Do Muslims sleep with each other outside of marriage? A ridiculous man. 

Grace* 

I met Tobi at a tech conference in Abuja. We dated for a year and were supposed to get married. But once our families got involved, it turned messy. Tobi’s parents warned him that Fulani people “don’t mix” and asked what kind of food his future wife would cook. My family didn’t have a problem with it but I couldn’t continue dating a man whose parents hated me. There were so many occasions where I hated myself for being Fulani, and that’s when I knew I had to leave.

Ola

I don’t know if this counts but we ended things because of religious differences. Her parents wanted her to marry a Christian by all means, and I’m Muslim. Actually I don’t practice any religion so that made things worse. We thought of running away and damning the consequences but we realized that was foolish. We also had to remember our future kids. It was hard to do but we pulled it off. It’s been 3 years now and I still can’t forget her. I think she’s married now. 

Miracle

Where do I even want to start from? I dated this girl for 5 years, only for her to tell me her parents did not approve of me. Why? Because I’m an atheist. I never knew her to be concerned about religion but she suddenly changed into a different person. It’s really sad because I loved her and I considered those things irrelevant. In 2025? Very ridiculous. I don’t know where she is now, I have moved on honestly.