Meet Austin, a 23-year-old University Of Ibadan graduate living in Nigeria’s craziest city: Lagos. Austin was a shy introvert who went on to lose his virginity to a lady he thinks might have been an ‘ogbanje’. In today’s Sex Diaries, he recounts the interesting and funny events that led up to and helped him lose his virginity.
The Backstory
Long ago, before I reshaped my life, I was an introvert: I kept to myself most of the time. My first girlfriend wasn’t the girl I lost my virginity to; to be honest, I cannot locate the girl to whom I lost my virginity anymore—shameful isn’t it? The only thing my first girlfriend gave me in abundance was kissing.
I can remember the time when I was “toasting” her. I was shaking like a fish out of water. However, it wasn’t my fault because then I had had only a few interactions with women.
I was in a boarding school and our hostel wasn’t mixed. I used to receive love letters back then but I didn’t know how to reply to them. I didn’t partake in the bush smooching or forest sex like my peers were doing; I was too timid. Thankfully, I didn’t spend much time in the boarding school back then in Ogun state. After I was done with school, I decided it was time to change. I wanted to be the ladies man; I wanted to be comfortable around women with the hope that it would eventually lead to me losing my virginity.
I thought losing my virginity would happen a lot sooner but I had to wait till I was in a higher institution to have sex for the first time. After watching loads of porn, I prepared myself. I surfed online self-help dating sites, and boy, were there a lot of them; they were all offering virtually the same thing. I read about Don Juan: read almost all the articles on sosauve.com (a sex story site). Those articles were purely based on interactions in the western world, talking about flowers and stuff, things that can’t work on this side of the world. The manuals and instructions couldn’t carry me far but they helped me learn a thing or two about women: they helped me prepare. Pick-up lines have always proven to be useless and they spoke about ice breakers which would only have been ideal abroad.
I read a lot of these articles but the most important part of the exercise was trying them out. My favorite part of the whole experience then was to look at at a babe, pay genuine compliments, study her mood, look for the easiest and most natural way of breaking the ice, and have about 5 follow-up questions to get the conversation started.
I wasn’t a party freak so I couldn’t get any headway there, but in school, I tried it out on a certain fancy chic in my class and it worked. She became my first and only friend in school for about a year before I started making friends with others.
The real deal
Chatting up girls in buses was also one of my favorite pastimes. I mastered the act like it was going out of business. I exchanged contacts with about 30 girls, and all brewed from conversations with them in public transportation; however, one of them was different. I can remember going to Yaba, and there was this girl beside me—kind of skinny, with average boobs and ass. She was seated beside me, and she was in a good mood. I started the conversation with “good afternoon” to which she replied pleasantly and we continued to talk till she came down at Palmgrove or so, I can’t really remember. We exchanged numbers. I was using a Nokia 2100 then: boy, those were the days.
However, there was one terrible flaw with this chic. I’m not sure if it was a flaw or if she was just trying to keep up but her spoken English was terrible. When I noticed, I tried to switch to Pidgin English but she would switch back to proper English. Her English was so terrible that listening to it almost gave me a headache. She would eventually become the woman I would lose my virginity to. After the bus incident, I didn’t call her for about 2 weeks and when I called, she was happy to hear from me regardless. I invited her over and without hesitation she said “okay,” which was strange: I was hoping she would deny my request. When she came, we talked for a bit. My student room was made in such a way that, you’d be bored and sex might just come up: no TV, just books which I didn’t read (they were there for decoration).
It wasn’t my first time being with a woman: I knew how to touch and caress. It was just that no girl had allowed me into their honeypot yet. The conversation kept flowing and our interaction was getting funnier. I also learnt how to touch in those articles: very informative shit. I touched her, one thing led to the other, and before you know it, we were kissing. I used my hand in other places like caressing her boobs, putting my hands underneath her top and she was getting aroused herself. I pulled her top over her head, unhooked her bra and the next thing I saw surprised me. I couldn’t find her nipple. The areola was there, but the nipple was missing. Turns out her nipples were inverted: the nipples were inside her boobs instead of sticking outside. Sigh. That didn’t change my mind though. I continued sucking her, and she kept moaning. I wanted to undo the zip of her jeans but she wouldn’t allow me, so I went back to her lips. Remember, there were no nipples to twist like a radio’s knob so I went back to sucking on it again. I took my hands down there again and she pushed them off, then she asked if I had a condom. ‘Jackpot!’, I screamed in my head, but I didn’t have a condom in my room. I was still dressed, so I told her I would get it in the second room. My erection was quite visible, so I pulled it up and put it where my belt buckle was to hold it from being visible to everyone. I ran out of my building to the closest aboki shop on my street which was about 10 blocks away: it was crazy. I ran like my life depended on it: well my virginity depended on it then. I got there and there was an elderly lady buying stuff for her grandchildren. I allowed her to finish, then I bought 3 packs of Gold Circle condoms, back then it was around 20 bucks. I ran back home and hoped that she hadn’t changed her mind, cursing myself for not having condoms around the house. Who does that? I still continued to blame myself.
I got home, panting like crazy, I looked at her on the bed, and she had my bed sheet over her. I was hoping she didn’t dress up the instant I left. She saw me panting but didn’t comment about it. Now that I remember, it was actually funny. I put the condom on the table and went back to kissing her. Even though I lost the erection I had earlier on, I soon got my erection back, and I yanked everything off. I gave her one condom and she strapped it on for me; I couldn’t believe I was about to lose my virginity.
I didn’t seem to care or feel awkward about premature or no premature ejaculation, all I just wanted to have was my first shag. I continued smooching and kissing her and then I held my dick against her inner thigh, unsure of where to put my dick, she used her hand to guide my dick into her pussy. It was tight, and being an amateur, I put it in a little and continued fucking her without my entire shaft going in. In our traditional mummy and daddy style, she grabbed my butt and pushed it deeper into her, and that was when I let out a sigh. It was nothing short of spectacular, the whole of my shaft in there. “So this is what sex feels like,” I thought to myself. I continued to fuck her, increasing my pace inside her until finally I exploded into her.
The aftermath
As a naive asshole, I pulled out of her being scared that the condom might break and I saw my own cum flood the condom, kneeling with my head bent in between her legs. We had sex one more time after that, and that session was way longer than the first one and her screams was louder than the first time too.
That is the uneventful way I lost my virginity. The funny thing is we never saw each other again after that day. Sadly, I haven’t seen anyone who looks like her till today: maybe she is an ogbanje. One of the things I’m grateful for is reading those articles the times I did. They opened my eyes on interactions, especially for my bus trips, because I have met a lot of ladies through that means. I still talk with some of them till today, and others, I haven’t even seen in a long time, but I fell in love with one and till today, it feels like we just met. I took some advice on how best to handle your crush, and it’s just a two word solution: Stay away!
This article is based on real-life events. Names used are mere pseudonyms to protect the identities of the individuals mentioned in the report.
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